A dream has come true: I am now an official member of a bowling league!!!!

I love to bowl, and I don’t mean in an ironic it’s-the-official-sport-of-mustaches sort of way.

So of course I didn’t even bat an eyelash when my super-cool friend Lauren invited me to play on her team.

This is “Spare Me”:

From left: Slow Roller, The Ringer, Da Phantom, The Mathematician

Oh yeah.

Unfortunately, tonight we were sharing a lane with the “Mltl High Scoregasms” who were a little more focused than we were. They were not too happy that it turned out that they were not competing against us, but with us against “papa’sdelicatecondition” and “the ball busters”.

I don’t think we won.

Maybe we’ll have better luck next week when we team up with “Lifeinthebowlinglane” against the Scoregasms and their new lane-mates, “The Michael Bowltons.” Let the showdown begin!

(Aren’t the names just the best part?)

By the way, I’m not sure when we’re going to get around to playing “Whoop, Spare It Is,” but I’ve already decided that they will be our rivals.

Whoop, Spare It Is

Let me point out that the girl could not be bothered to remove her hat or her pearls, and that the guy — whom you might notice is not too cool for polka dots and stripes — acquiesced only to wearing the t-shirt in his back pocket. For real? Why are you in a bowling league if you don’t plan to give into all the cheese that accompanies it? What ass-bowls.

On my way back to the subway after the game, I happened to overhear a guy on his cell phone say this little pearl of wisdom:

I’m getting all nar-nar just thinking about it!

Maybe I’m not hipster enough to get this but, what could it possibly mean to get “all nar-nar”? Urban Dictionary-it if you like, I’m not going to touch it.

And of course, here is your daily dose of Wally:

J and Wally